Tuesday, November 3, 2009
Birthing in Oaxaca
A friend of mine sent me this link to a birth she attended. It is a very cool birth story.
Monday, November 2, 2009
Divinely Perfect - The Birth of Amafaye
If I were to describe the delivery of my daughter Amafaye with two words I would say it was Divinely Perfect!
I had been having “labor pains” for about 10 days prior to her Birth Day. I'm grateful for those 10 days because the contractions were great preparation for the big day! [However, it was kind of frustrating since every day I questioned “Is it going to be today?”]
On October 2, 2009 I went to sleep about an hour and a half earlier than normal (11:00p). At 1:57a (Oct 3) I woke up to an itch on the top of my left foot. (This itch was right where Liver 1 is for those of you who know acupuncture). As I was giving it a good scratch with my right foot I felt a little bubble burst inside me and a small gush of water. Instantly I was like “oh my,” and went to the bathroom where more fluid poured out from between my legs. At this point I was a little bummed because I wanted my daughter to be born in her sac, for the people from Nepal call these babies “magic babies,” and I found her to be quite magical :)
Once this occurred I got my house mate and birth partner Simone to help me set up my bed for birth time and I called Maria. Listening to Maria's advice I tried to lay down and rest. I turned on a Hypnobirthing cd and laid down for One contraction. I already had to be moving through them for that was the only way it felt good! I got into a cozy position on all fours and looked out my window (the curtains were just barely parted) and I saw the virtually Full moon shining down on me! (it was full the next day). I asked Goddess Moon to guide me and give me the strength and energy I needed for the night. At 3am I called one of my best friends in IA. As I was having surges with her on the phone she reminded me to bring my voice LOW. This piece of advice guided my entire experience and helped the pain transmute from my body through my voice! I started OM'ing through each surge, going lower and lower. I then called my chiropractor and friend Christina who timed my contractions at 2 minutes apart. So, it was time to call Maria back. After these two phone calls, I knew both women were on their way. At this point in time my birth partner Simone had also woken back up. Perfect timing! She took care of everything I needed from this point on. She set up the cozy foam mat on the floor and after I was on the mat I was in my own world from that point on...
(Christina is my Chiropractor friend who practices N.E.T. Which clears emotions from your being/body as you experience them, and from past experiences if they're linked to what's going on).
Maria and Christina arrived close together and were my guiding lights through the evening (technically morning). When Christina got there I was doing a good job of clearing all emotions through each surge. As this got more difficult she held my emotional points and helped me clear emotions throughout the entire labor. At one moment I was stressed because I knew she had a very important seminar to be at at 8:45a and I didn't want her to leave.
When Maria checked me I was already at 9cm and was given the go to push if I felt the urge. At this point I was already having rectal pressure and felt everything in full swing! I had the urge to sit on the toilet however once there I felt uncomfortable very quickly. Christina suggested the bath since my back muscles were feeling quite tense and tired. I got into the bathtub and the warm water was a godsend for relaxing my back! Things progressed in there very nicely. It was so great to hear all the encouraging words from everyone around. This was the first time for me to birth a baby and to be told that I'm doing great by a midwife who's delivered hundreds of babies gave me added confidence and endurance!
After a little while of being on all fours in the tub it was time to move back to the mat in my room. Here I maintained the all fours position (which I had a feeling pre-birth that I would be in) with pillows and blankets supporting me when I'd rest in between pushes. Once here we were in the final stretch...
I could feel my baby's head come close to emerging and then go back inside some. When I reached down to touch her head I felt a bubble. Sure enough one of her membranes did not break, she had part of her sac in tact over her head! Each surge and push was Intense! In one moment my “normal” self emerged as I said “This is so freaking Crazy!” During this time, again, Maria's words seemed channeled in their timing and message. She told me how well I was spreading and opening right when I had a question about how things were going from another perspective. I felt like I was opening very wide and very well until a moment happened when I felt a pain towards the front. As I felt this pain Maria suggested I do short pushes and my baby will be here. This was the only time I felt fear. I was well-prepared for the short pushes as I was taught in Hypnobirthing and had practiced during pregnancy with my bowels, however the front tear pain gave me the “omg I don't want to” feeling. Yet, hearing that I do this and then my baby will be here was perfect motivation. Short pushes, here we go! Literally within minutes of two or three series of short pushes and I'm holding my baby's head and catching her body! I hear the cutest little cry and then it's quiet and I'm holding her and looking into her eyes! As I hold her my placenta virtually falls out right after! I continue looking at her observe the world around her as Amanda (the other midwife) wipes her off. She looks around like “Where am I? What just happened?” She's so content even though she's brand new to this world! Now the time is 7:26a. Perfect timing! (Christina was able to be here the whole time). 5 and a half hours-first birth, great releases of pain, amazing vocalization, emotions flowing, people I love, no external perineal tearing, Yeah it was Divinely Perfect! I wouldn't have asked for a more wonderful amazing experience! Oh, and my magic baby had her un-ruptured membrane wiped from her face as she emerged into the world—what a great way to enter and 'be revealed!' Welcome to earth Amafaye Violet!
Saturday, October 31, 2009
Wednesday, October 21, 2009
Believe
Believe me, I have had my ups and downs. Some have recently been surprised to see my name after irate blog comments, “wow, that doesn’t sound like you,” is the usual response. Some have seen it on my face at work, saying, “Oh, so that’s what’s up.” And my partner is riding through the storm of each day’s report back of the latest news in midwifery. Good thing she is in the news and loves the drama. Of course, she’s on my side though and has lots of strategic ideas. But the latest midwifery round of betrayal and bad faith negotiating has made me look at my core. I ask myself: “What do I believe?”
I am not sure if I was always someone who subverted the dominant paradigm. When is it that you first notice that you don’t want to shop at the Safeway or Walmart? How does that even happen? How do those values arise? Why is it that some are unwilling to follow the flow and insist on following the beat of a different drummer? I grew up in a mainstream town, lived in a family that followed all the mainstream trends, from shopping at Sears to buying whatever was on sale in the Penny Saver. Does my father even now what Organic means? I am sure he does not.
So, when, how and why did that all come about? Wouldn’t it have been easier for me to just step in line and keep up with Joneses. It began in college. I fell into step with the hippies at the Crafts House and found a resonance there that was refreshing, different, exciting and inspiring. These were people who I wanted to be with. They had ideas that were different and unusual. Like vegetables. These people ate lots of them and some of them only at vegetables. Organic when possible. Simply by choosing different food to eat, I had stepped into a different world. A world largely different from the flow around us.
This world, of course, opened my eyes to other non-dominant paradigm ideas as well: tie dye, communal living, non-violence and enlightenment. My eyes were wide, my heart open and my mind filling with information. And of course, we were all together, living in the grooviest place on campus, the Crafts House.
So that is how it all began, I didn’t grow up a hippie or have any encouragement from my family. As a matter of fact, most I what I do and feel now, they definitely do not understand. In the same way that I can not understand them. But I moved out of the Crafts House, graduated from college, and began my life as an adult groover in earnest.
By many standards, I am not EVEN that groovy. I don’t spin wool, I don’t make my own goat cheese, I don’t even have a pet. But I do recycle, I do try to remember to bring my own bags to the grocery story, I compost my food scraps, and I practice as a midwife. A homebirth midwife, that is. A non-dominant paridigm midwife. I am out on the edges of society with the less than 1% of women and families who are choosing this too. Why are we here? Because we believe.
So, what is it that we believe in so strongly that we insist on swimming upstream? I started out believing when I was 12 years old that I wanted to help people. I wanted to deal with real life scenarios that would involve excitement, intrigue, precision, and healing. I wanted to immerse myself in a life where I was needed as an integral member of the community. I wanted to know people on a first name basis and sit down to dinner with them after a long day’s work. Being a country doctor may have fulfilled all of these wishes. But when I was a student in college, with all of the other pre-med students, I realized that I was not on a trajectory that would lead me to that end. I felt that I was at the beginning of a long journey that would propel me head-long into medicine, without knowing truly how to heal people. So, I changed course. I looked away from the dominant paradigm. I looked away from medical school. But at the time, I didn’t know where to turn.
Until I graduated and lived on the Vineyard for a summer. A friend of mine handed me Spiritual Midwifery and said I might be interested. There they were. The hippies, the counter-culture, the ones eschewing the dominant paradigm with aplomb and vigor. And they were having their babies in buses and on a commune with midwives. I knew this was it. This was the healing, the wholism, the community, the culture, the spirituality that I had been looking for. Midwifery would provide a connection to women and families and children and society. Midwifery would provide a spirituality that was rooted in everyday miracles and the unbridled power of women. Midwifery would provide a healing pathway for women as they reached deep down inside of themselves to find the inner strength to give birth. Midwifery would provide a healing pathway for families as the witnessing and participating in birth led to unparalleled bonding, love and admiration. Midwifery would provide a strong intellectual stimulus for my mind, ever searching for meaning behind the signals of birth, always fascinated and learning. Birth is never fully knowable. All of these things I believed as I finished my reading of Spiritual Midwifery, ran to the store and bought Heart and Hands, and transported myself to El Paso, TX to attend midwifery school.
It all began as beliefs.
Twenty four years later and almost having seen 1000 babies come into the world, it is much more than belief. It is deep inner knowing from having witnessed women in their travail, in their glory, in their achievement. The women themselves have been my teachers. The women and their babies. The women and their partners. The women and their wisdom.
I believe that women are strong, powerful and resilient. I believe that midwives are valued by their clients as trusted guides and facilitators of birth. Midwives hold women when they are most vulnerable: raw, open, surrendered. Midwives honor mothers for the amazing job they are doing, birthing their babies. Midwives touch women’s lives in a way that resonates for decades.
I believe in my work. I believe in the work of my colleagues.
I am not sure if I was always someone who subverted the dominant paradigm. When is it that you first notice that you don’t want to shop at the Safeway or Walmart? How does that even happen? How do those values arise? Why is it that some are unwilling to follow the flow and insist on following the beat of a different drummer? I grew up in a mainstream town, lived in a family that followed all the mainstream trends, from shopping at Sears to buying whatever was on sale in the Penny Saver. Does my father even now what Organic means? I am sure he does not.
So, when, how and why did that all come about? Wouldn’t it have been easier for me to just step in line and keep up with Joneses. It began in college. I fell into step with the hippies at the Crafts House and found a resonance there that was refreshing, different, exciting and inspiring. These were people who I wanted to be with. They had ideas that were different and unusual. Like vegetables. These people ate lots of them and some of them only at vegetables. Organic when possible. Simply by choosing different food to eat, I had stepped into a different world. A world largely different from the flow around us.
This world, of course, opened my eyes to other non-dominant paradigm ideas as well: tie dye, communal living, non-violence and enlightenment. My eyes were wide, my heart open and my mind filling with information. And of course, we were all together, living in the grooviest place on campus, the Crafts House.
So that is how it all began, I didn’t grow up a hippie or have any encouragement from my family. As a matter of fact, most I what I do and feel now, they definitely do not understand. In the same way that I can not understand them. But I moved out of the Crafts House, graduated from college, and began my life as an adult groover in earnest.
By many standards, I am not EVEN that groovy. I don’t spin wool, I don’t make my own goat cheese, I don’t even have a pet. But I do recycle, I do try to remember to bring my own bags to the grocery story, I compost my food scraps, and I practice as a midwife. A homebirth midwife, that is. A non-dominant paridigm midwife. I am out on the edges of society with the less than 1% of women and families who are choosing this too. Why are we here? Because we believe.
So, what is it that we believe in so strongly that we insist on swimming upstream? I started out believing when I was 12 years old that I wanted to help people. I wanted to deal with real life scenarios that would involve excitement, intrigue, precision, and healing. I wanted to immerse myself in a life where I was needed as an integral member of the community. I wanted to know people on a first name basis and sit down to dinner with them after a long day’s work. Being a country doctor may have fulfilled all of these wishes. But when I was a student in college, with all of the other pre-med students, I realized that I was not on a trajectory that would lead me to that end. I felt that I was at the beginning of a long journey that would propel me head-long into medicine, without knowing truly how to heal people. So, I changed course. I looked away from the dominant paradigm. I looked away from medical school. But at the time, I didn’t know where to turn.
Until I graduated and lived on the Vineyard for a summer. A friend of mine handed me Spiritual Midwifery and said I might be interested. There they were. The hippies, the counter-culture, the ones eschewing the dominant paradigm with aplomb and vigor. And they were having their babies in buses and on a commune with midwives. I knew this was it. This was the healing, the wholism, the community, the culture, the spirituality that I had been looking for. Midwifery would provide a connection to women and families and children and society. Midwifery would provide a spirituality that was rooted in everyday miracles and the unbridled power of women. Midwifery would provide a healing pathway for women as they reached deep down inside of themselves to find the inner strength to give birth. Midwifery would provide a healing pathway for families as the witnessing and participating in birth led to unparalleled bonding, love and admiration. Midwifery would provide a strong intellectual stimulus for my mind, ever searching for meaning behind the signals of birth, always fascinated and learning. Birth is never fully knowable. All of these things I believed as I finished my reading of Spiritual Midwifery, ran to the store and bought Heart and Hands, and transported myself to El Paso, TX to attend midwifery school.
It all began as beliefs.
Twenty four years later and almost having seen 1000 babies come into the world, it is much more than belief. It is deep inner knowing from having witnessed women in their travail, in their glory, in their achievement. The women themselves have been my teachers. The women and their babies. The women and their partners. The women and their wisdom.
I believe that women are strong, powerful and resilient. I believe that midwives are valued by their clients as trusted guides and facilitators of birth. Midwives hold women when they are most vulnerable: raw, open, surrendered. Midwives honor mothers for the amazing job they are doing, birthing their babies. Midwives touch women’s lives in a way that resonates for decades.
I believe in my work. I believe in the work of my colleagues.
Tuesday, September 29, 2009
Monday, September 28, 2009
Thursday, September 24, 2009
Normal Birth
"If midwives are to remain at the forefront of decision-making that supports "normal birth', they need to challenge the culture and constraints of the organisations within which they work and initiate research and reflection on the complexity of 'normal birth".
What is "normal birth" and is that really what we want? That was the topic of my class today with the UCSF CNM students. It is still orientation, so not a lot of homework yet, but we spent three hours analyzing the concept of normal birth. What is normal? Who gets to have a normal birth? If your birth is not normal, what is it-- abnormal? Birth: undisturbed, simple, uncomplicated, natural, physiological, ordinary. Do any of these words truly express what we know to be true? That birth is a complex, powerful process by which a woman transitions from pregnancy to motherhood. That birth has physical, social, emotional, cultural and spiritual implications. That birth is mysterious and contains elements that are unknowable. We as midwives are obligated to rediscover, redefine, preserve and honor normal birth. Let's continue the dialog.
Sunday, September 20, 2009
My Birth Story by Misha
I had a beautiful birth. It was not the birth I had envisioned but it was a great experience. We had planned to labor and deliver at home with our midwife, Maria Iorillo. We had a back-up hospital set up in case we needed to transfer for any reason.
Thursday, 9 p.m.
I lost my mucus plug but discovered I was leaking fluid. Thinking this was part of the deal with mucus plugs, I thought nothing of it until the leaking continued overnight. I was suspicious that my water had broken. I called Maria and she said she was 95% sure my water had broken. The goal now was to start contractions. We had 72 hours before I would have to be induced.
Friday, 5 p.m.
Ready to get this show on the road, I acted on one of Maria’s recommendations and drank 2 ounces of castor oil. She came by an hour later to check in on me. After testing the fluid, we were now certain my water had broken. She said to be patient and wait. She also left us with some herbs to try the next day if contractions didn’t begin overnight.
Friday, 7 p.m.
My first contraction came shortly after 7 p.m. Twenty minutes later I had the second. Ten minutes later another. Four minutes later another and from then on it was every four minutes. Each contraction was a minute or longer. We were in labor! After an hour of this we called Maria, as we had hit 4-1-1 (4 minutes apart, 1 minute long for 1 hour).
It was tough, intense and I was a little scared by how fast things seemed to be going. I labored mostly standing up, leaning over our dining table and breathing deep, loud, yoga breaths. It was rough but doable. I was having back labor but didn’t realize how intensely until Maria suggested Alan rub or push on my back during the contractions. SO helpful! Because my water had broken 24 hours before, our midwife decided to delay any internal exams until I had the urge to push to reduce the risk of infection to me and the baby.
After eight hours of contractions, I felt the urge to push and asked Maria to check me. I was only 2 centimeters. I knew I was in for a long haul. My mother and sister had both delivered their first children in eight hours so I was discouraged. We labored a bit longer but it was impossible to not push. There were signs I was dilating and we wondered if things were now moving faster so I asked Maria to check again. I was only 3 centimeters and my cervix was swelling. Not good.
We now had a couple options. We could keep laboring at home. This would require me to resist the urge to push, and hope the cervix stopped swelling and eventually get to 10 centimeters. If I couldn’t stop pushing there was the risk that my cervix would continue to swell and a c-section would be needed.
The other option was to go to the hospital and get an epidural to take away the pushing sensation. This would also increase the probability of a c-section but it also gave me a possibility of a vaginal birth, something that was really important to me.
We debated the options for a couple hours but it became clear to me I would not be able to resist pushing for another 7 centimeters. So we headed to the hospital.
Saturday, 6 a.m.
We arrived at St. Luke’s Hospital and waited as they drew blood and prepped me for an epidural. The staff midwife was optimistic I would continue to contract on my own since my contractions were regular, strong and long. The anesthesiologist arrived about an hour and a half later. He was awesome and got the epidural in between two really bad contractions. The epidural didn’t hurt and after it took affect, I barely felt anything. It kicked in almost immediately and then we tried to rest.
After the epidural my contractions slowed to 10 minutes apart and we decided to start pitocin to get them going again. Then the long waiting process began as we allowed my body to do its thing.
At 5:30 p.m. I finally fell asleep after not having a good night’s sleep in two days. When I woke up at 7 p.m. they decided to check me. In my groggy haze, I heard them say “You’re complete. We can start pushing!” I couldn’t believe we were finally there, 24 hours after my first contraction and almost 48 hours after my water broke, it was time to birth!
Saturday, 7 p.m.
The epidural made it difficult to feel all the contractions and push properly. I needed someone to literally push on me to give me a focal point to push back. I was also shaking uncontrollably from the epidural and adrenaline, so it was hard to get a break in between.
Saturday, 9:01 p.m.
I made steady progress and 1 hour 45 minutes later the midwife told Alan to come around if he was going to catch his daughter. Alan lovingly delivered our baby and placed her on my tummy at 9:01 p.m. The first thing I asked was “is it a girl?” Even though we were told the sex at an ultrasound, I knew there was a possibility they could be wrong.
We waited for the cord to stop pulsing before cutting it. Alan cut it and then started holding the baby directly against his skin to keep her warm while the staff finished up with me. It was such a beautiful moment.
I had a first degree tear. After stitching me up and slowing down the epidural, Alan put the baby on my chest. It was such an awesome feeling to see and hold my daughter. She is beautiful and perfect and worth every minute of the adventure. I still cannot believe I did it. It is the craziest thing I’ve ever experienced in my life. Our birth experience was full of surprises and challenges, but it was amazing.
Marcelle Diane is named after our mothers. We loved both names and felt it was great to use family names. We are going with the nickname Ellie. She weighed 7 pounds 4 ounces at birth and was 19.5 inches long. She arrived 48 hours after my water broke and after 26 hours of labor. It was the most intense, beautiful, mystifying experience of my life. And I wouldn’t change it.
You can find out more about home birth transfer rates and safety in this British Medical Journal Study:
http://www.bmj.com/cgi/content/full/bmj;330/7505/1416
Thursday, 9 p.m.
I lost my mucus plug but discovered I was leaking fluid. Thinking this was part of the deal with mucus plugs, I thought nothing of it until the leaking continued overnight. I was suspicious that my water had broken. I called Maria and she said she was 95% sure my water had broken. The goal now was to start contractions. We had 72 hours before I would have to be induced.
Friday, 5 p.m.
Ready to get this show on the road, I acted on one of Maria’s recommendations and drank 2 ounces of castor oil. She came by an hour later to check in on me. After testing the fluid, we were now certain my water had broken. She said to be patient and wait. She also left us with some herbs to try the next day if contractions didn’t begin overnight.
Friday, 7 p.m.
My first contraction came shortly after 7 p.m. Twenty minutes later I had the second. Ten minutes later another. Four minutes later another and from then on it was every four minutes. Each contraction was a minute or longer. We were in labor! After an hour of this we called Maria, as we had hit 4-1-1 (4 minutes apart, 1 minute long for 1 hour).
It was tough, intense and I was a little scared by how fast things seemed to be going. I labored mostly standing up, leaning over our dining table and breathing deep, loud, yoga breaths. It was rough but doable. I was having back labor but didn’t realize how intensely until Maria suggested Alan rub or push on my back during the contractions. SO helpful! Because my water had broken 24 hours before, our midwife decided to delay any internal exams until I had the urge to push to reduce the risk of infection to me and the baby.
After eight hours of contractions, I felt the urge to push and asked Maria to check me. I was only 2 centimeters. I knew I was in for a long haul. My mother and sister had both delivered their first children in eight hours so I was discouraged. We labored a bit longer but it was impossible to not push. There were signs I was dilating and we wondered if things were now moving faster so I asked Maria to check again. I was only 3 centimeters and my cervix was swelling. Not good.
We now had a couple options. We could keep laboring at home. This would require me to resist the urge to push, and hope the cervix stopped swelling and eventually get to 10 centimeters. If I couldn’t stop pushing there was the risk that my cervix would continue to swell and a c-section would be needed.
The other option was to go to the hospital and get an epidural to take away the pushing sensation. This would also increase the probability of a c-section but it also gave me a possibility of a vaginal birth, something that was really important to me.
We debated the options for a couple hours but it became clear to me I would not be able to resist pushing for another 7 centimeters. So we headed to the hospital.
Saturday, 6 a.m.
We arrived at St. Luke’s Hospital and waited as they drew blood and prepped me for an epidural. The staff midwife was optimistic I would continue to contract on my own since my contractions were regular, strong and long. The anesthesiologist arrived about an hour and a half later. He was awesome and got the epidural in between two really bad contractions. The epidural didn’t hurt and after it took affect, I barely felt anything. It kicked in almost immediately and then we tried to rest.
After the epidural my contractions slowed to 10 minutes apart and we decided to start pitocin to get them going again. Then the long waiting process began as we allowed my body to do its thing.
At 5:30 p.m. I finally fell asleep after not having a good night’s sleep in two days. When I woke up at 7 p.m. they decided to check me. In my groggy haze, I heard them say “You’re complete. We can start pushing!” I couldn’t believe we were finally there, 24 hours after my first contraction and almost 48 hours after my water broke, it was time to birth!
Saturday, 7 p.m.
The epidural made it difficult to feel all the contractions and push properly. I needed someone to literally push on me to give me a focal point to push back. I was also shaking uncontrollably from the epidural and adrenaline, so it was hard to get a break in between.
Saturday, 9:01 p.m.
I made steady progress and 1 hour 45 minutes later the midwife told Alan to come around if he was going to catch his daughter. Alan lovingly delivered our baby and placed her on my tummy at 9:01 p.m. The first thing I asked was “is it a girl?” Even though we were told the sex at an ultrasound, I knew there was a possibility they could be wrong.
We waited for the cord to stop pulsing before cutting it. Alan cut it and then started holding the baby directly against his skin to keep her warm while the staff finished up with me. It was such a beautiful moment.
I had a first degree tear. After stitching me up and slowing down the epidural, Alan put the baby on my chest. It was such an awesome feeling to see and hold my daughter. She is beautiful and perfect and worth every minute of the adventure. I still cannot believe I did it. It is the craziest thing I’ve ever experienced in my life. Our birth experience was full of surprises and challenges, but it was amazing.
Marcelle Diane is named after our mothers. We loved both names and felt it was great to use family names. We are going with the nickname Ellie. She weighed 7 pounds 4 ounces at birth and was 19.5 inches long. She arrived 48 hours after my water broke and after 26 hours of labor. It was the most intense, beautiful, mystifying experience of my life. And I wouldn’t change it.
You can find out more about home birth transfer rates and safety in this British Medical Journal Study:
http://www.bmj.com/cgi/content/full/bmj;330/7505/1416
Friday, September 18, 2009
Noah Adriano
Here's the note from Mary, Noah's Mom:Dear Maria, Thank you so much for the care, attention, and guidance you provided through my pregnancy. Even being on vacation, thousands of miles away, you provided advice and reassurance during a challenging labor. Even though I didn't have my homebirth, I believe choosing the midwifery model of care helped me make good decisions. I felt in control, empowered, and had the mental fortitude to make it through 32 hours of labor!
Thank you so much, Mary, Dennis and Noah
Yes, while I was on vacation on the other side of the country, lovely Noah made his arrival on July 26, 2009. Mary and Dennis are the proud parents of this little one who came in at 8 pounds even. Mary is an amazing mama who showed her commitment and faith, letting go where she needed to and holding fast to the rest. Congratulations Mary and Dennis!
Thursday, September 17, 2009
The Birth of Kennedy Maria Shelby by Earth Lande
Kennedy Maria Shelby was born on Monday Sept.16th at 7:35am. She was 7lbs 4oz and 20inches long. She is a true and soulful beauty with Raven black curly hair, deep and shiny onyx colored eyes. She was made from love and is now and forever will be fully immersed in deepest love.
Bright and Early Sunday morning Kristine and I realized that the baby was really going to come soon. She started feeling menstrual like cramping that came in waves every 5 to 7 minutes. We were ecstatic and started to get everything ready. Kristine called Marcus and the three of us rearranged the house, filled up the birth tub and treasured the wonderful feeling of knowing there would soon be a beautiful baby. Sam was next to arrive with flowers and then Holly with wine and champagne. For the next 9 hours Kristine and her birth team just enjoyed each other’s company. We saged the house and made sure to sage each other and said what we wanted out loud for the birth. We created a birth shrine with candles, photos of family and symbols of strength. Later Kristine and Marcus took a walk, I read and did homework.. Marcus played beautiful music on the piano, Holly ,Sam, and I bonded over delicious wine as Marcus and Kristine slept.
Kristie Mattolli brought over the most amazing food and Sam made sure that Mama Hick’s ate...Later that evening Grandma and Auntie Shelby arrived. As nightfall came we all sat around talking about the future of this little one and Kristine got a chance to again talk about how the baby would sleep with her and Marcus, not be exposed to television and how pleased she was to be having baby at home. I was so impressed by her authentic faith in her body’s ability to birth her baby. She was the picture of tranquil strength.
We all knew that the baby was not coming that night. The midwife told Kristine to have a glass of wine and to get some rest. Holly’s 2 year old daughter, an out of this world beauty, had told Kristine early that day that the baby was coming tomorrow and it was going to be a girl. Only 4 other people thought she would birth a girl. Including Grandma and Auntie Shelby, Tess the baby and her friend Cheryl.
Her contractions were coming every 7-12 minutes by the time everyone left but me. When I left to get some rest at 9:45pm her contractions were again coming every 5 minutes lasting for 30 sec. At 12:45 am I got a call from Marcus that it was on. I returned to the house at 1:15am with Grandma Shelby. Her heavy labor came around 11pm. When I arrived the house was dark expect for a few burning ox blood colored candles. She was in the birth pool and I have never seen Kristine more beautiful. She exuded so much light and power. Her undeniable raw energy took my breath away. I knew instantly that I had walked in to a den where the veil between the spirit world and the physical world had been removed. I was humbled knowing the I was going to witness the most sacred rites of passage. The only sounds were of Kristine. She went from orgasmic like moans, to primal wails to screams of passion. Maria her midwife was there and so were Kristine’s parents. It was the most profound experience in all my 28 years. I felt emotions that I never knew existed. Kristine, my soul sister, went to an ancient place that only birthing women can go. We all knew that she was her animal self. She abandoned her understanding of the here and now and surrendered that night to power of giving life. I will never get over being a part of the most divine of life's transformations.
Marcus was amazing. He was there for her however she needed him, Maria was so lovely and calm and gave me a sense of peace. Sam and Holly were also outrageously wonderful both so in tuned to Kristine. There were times I thought why does she have to be in so much pain, I had to bite my tongue hard a couple of times to stop from crying. I just wanted to hold her and make the pain stop. Her parents were in total anguish during those last 3 hours. They know their baby girl and have never seen her in so much pain. Even though they wanted to call 911 they did not. Her parents were so scared for their daughter; however, their faith in her endurance and ability was stronger. Her birth angels were there. Making sure Kristine could handle what ever came her way. I prayed and visualized Kristine surrounded by all the wise women before her guiding her giving her the power to go on.
She did not find out how far she was dilated until she had the urge to push. By this point she was in her room with her knees on the floor resting her arms and face on Sam’s thighs who was lying on the bed. I was next to Maria acting as her assistant. Marcus was going back and forth between sitting next to Sam and lying on the floor when the baby’s head started to crown. Holly was filming the birth. The grandparents were watching from the doorway. She pushed for about 50 minutes. At the very end it was obvious that Kristine was starting to go to a place of fear. Maria told her something I will never forget. “ Kristine," she said in her serene voice of authority, "that place that you are going to when you scream, you have to go there and surrender to it, that is the ring of fire, you must go through it. You are at the last doorway. Walk through and you will have your baby." Kristine at that moment thought, I either surrender to the pain or prolong it for hours. Her water finally broke just moments before her angel was born. When the baby’s head came out we all started crying and smiling. Her baby was born and I could not believe that she was real. Thank you, Marcus and Kristine, for creating this life. Thank you, Kennedy, for choosing them, and thank you, Kristine, for deepening my faith that homebirth is normal birth. It was the most extraordinary miracle and most normal experience of my life.
Bright and Early Sunday morning Kristine and I realized that the baby was really going to come soon. She started feeling menstrual like cramping that came in waves every 5 to 7 minutes. We were ecstatic and started to get everything ready. Kristine called Marcus and the three of us rearranged the house, filled up the birth tub and treasured the wonderful feeling of knowing there would soon be a beautiful baby. Sam was next to arrive with flowers and then Holly with wine and champagne. For the next 9 hours Kristine and her birth team just enjoyed each other’s company. We saged the house and made sure to sage each other and said what we wanted out loud for the birth. We created a birth shrine with candles, photos of family and symbols of strength. Later Kristine and Marcus took a walk, I read and did homework.. Marcus played beautiful music on the piano, Holly ,Sam, and I bonded over delicious wine as Marcus and Kristine slept.
Kristie Mattolli brought over the most amazing food and Sam made sure that Mama Hick’s ate...Later that evening Grandma and Auntie Shelby arrived. As nightfall came we all sat around talking about the future of this little one and Kristine got a chance to again talk about how the baby would sleep with her and Marcus, not be exposed to television and how pleased she was to be having baby at home. I was so impressed by her authentic faith in her body’s ability to birth her baby. She was the picture of tranquil strength.
We all knew that the baby was not coming that night. The midwife told Kristine to have a glass of wine and to get some rest. Holly’s 2 year old daughter, an out of this world beauty, had told Kristine early that day that the baby was coming tomorrow and it was going to be a girl. Only 4 other people thought she would birth a girl. Including Grandma and Auntie Shelby, Tess the baby and her friend Cheryl.
Her contractions were coming every 7-12 minutes by the time everyone left but me. When I left to get some rest at 9:45pm her contractions were again coming every 5 minutes lasting for 30 sec. At 12:45 am I got a call from Marcus that it was on. I returned to the house at 1:15am with Grandma Shelby. Her heavy labor came around 11pm. When I arrived the house was dark expect for a few burning ox blood colored candles. She was in the birth pool and I have never seen Kristine more beautiful. She exuded so much light and power. Her undeniable raw energy took my breath away. I knew instantly that I had walked in to a den where the veil between the spirit world and the physical world had been removed. I was humbled knowing the I was going to witness the most sacred rites of passage. The only sounds were of Kristine. She went from orgasmic like moans, to primal wails to screams of passion. Maria her midwife was there and so were Kristine’s parents. It was the most profound experience in all my 28 years. I felt emotions that I never knew existed. Kristine, my soul sister, went to an ancient place that only birthing women can go. We all knew that she was her animal self. She abandoned her understanding of the here and now and surrendered that night to power of giving life. I will never get over being a part of the most divine of life's transformations.
Marcus was amazing. He was there for her however she needed him, Maria was so lovely and calm and gave me a sense of peace. Sam and Holly were also outrageously wonderful both so in tuned to Kristine. There were times I thought why does she have to be in so much pain, I had to bite my tongue hard a couple of times to stop from crying. I just wanted to hold her and make the pain stop. Her parents were in total anguish during those last 3 hours. They know their baby girl and have never seen her in so much pain. Even though they wanted to call 911 they did not. Her parents were so scared for their daughter; however, their faith in her endurance and ability was stronger. Her birth angels were there. Making sure Kristine could handle what ever came her way. I prayed and visualized Kristine surrounded by all the wise women before her guiding her giving her the power to go on.
She did not find out how far she was dilated until she had the urge to push. By this point she was in her room with her knees on the floor resting her arms and face on Sam’s thighs who was lying on the bed. I was next to Maria acting as her assistant. Marcus was going back and forth between sitting next to Sam and lying on the floor when the baby’s head started to crown. Holly was filming the birth. The grandparents were watching from the doorway. She pushed for about 50 minutes. At the very end it was obvious that Kristine was starting to go to a place of fear. Maria told her something I will never forget. “ Kristine," she said in her serene voice of authority, "that place that you are going to when you scream, you have to go there and surrender to it, that is the ring of fire, you must go through it. You are at the last doorway. Walk through and you will have your baby." Kristine at that moment thought, I either surrender to the pain or prolong it for hours. Her water finally broke just moments before her angel was born. When the baby’s head came out we all started crying and smiling. Her baby was born and I could not believe that she was real. Thank you, Marcus and Kristine, for creating this life. Thank you, Kennedy, for choosing them, and thank you, Kristine, for deepening my faith that homebirth is normal birth. It was the most extraordinary miracle and most normal experience of my life.
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